Forgiving

For my j.

A constellation suspended in dark
The night caught by candle bright
As the night goes about luminous
Both of us alone, just waiting.

It is three in the morning
I debate the changes in my life
This month has been somewhat gray
Certainly did bring extreme changes.

I not the kind to ever expected
Still a little numb and focusing
On taking one breath at a time
Where I am emotionally right now.

I try to navigate a brand new life
One I never imagined myself waking up to
For the moment, I am taking refuge
On a beautiful beach determined.

Giving my spirit the space it needs to heal
There really is something powerful
About going into the water and Letting vast
Deep waters reminding us we are just a wee atom.

That my problems don’t amount to anything
When tossed into this infinite universe
But I also feel a bit of hope for our lives
When I enter the ocean thinking of you.

Chasing waves, laughter rising above the spray
It carries me to a better place, home to you
I imagine all those who have stood here
On these shores, alone and in this place.

Some broken and battered hearts
Searching for one small speck of sense
Within the madness, one tiny grain of hope
Above me, endless sky. Before me the sea.

Behind me, too much pain to endure
So I look ahead and pray With all my soul
That I can find the strength in you to survive
That you are real and soon we will be together.

I want to understand the choices I make
Even if they make no sense and find a way
For you to forgive me and the unforgivable
To take me in your arms; stay for eternity.

I love you.

If you could be forgiving , a little while longer.