Because

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I can’t remember the last time
I saw you.
or at least, that’s what I tell
you every time we talk.

Because I don’t want you to know
how many times I’ve replayed
the sight of your eyes
looking into mine,
tears blurring my vision
as I watched you walk away.

You look different now,
but always the same.

Always familiar.
I want to step away from you.

Distance will always be
the thing that saves me
so I’ve learned how to use it
every time I’m terrified.

And you scare me more
than anything.

I told myself I wouldn’t go here.

I told myself I wouldn’t do this again.

I told myself I wouldn’t come,
but I do every fucking time.

I want to.
I have to.
Because I miss you.
Because I still love you.

 

~Inspired and conspired
“For the Love of a Poet”
A collaboration by John and Katie

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